When she addressed the English troops at Tilbury, Queen Elizabeth I inspired them with a speech that began:
"I know I have the body of a weak and feeble woman; but I have the heart and stomach of a king, and of a king of England too".
I'd like to say something similar. I know I have the body of a trailing spouse and a stay at home mum; but I have the heart and stomach of a feminist... I suppose I could add ...and a feminist of England too, which would sound very splendid, but I'm not quite sure what it would mean.
Feminism has a bad press, but honestly, how can a woman NOT be a feminist. All it means, when it boils down to it, is that you are someone who believes that women are equal to men, and should have the same rights and opportunities as men to make of themselves what they want. I flinch a little, if I see a reference in the mummy blogging world to mums who have jobs as being 'good role models' for their children. Yes, I suppose I'm a little defensive. We stay at home mums can't help it, from time to time. But I feel I might just be a 'good role model' for my children, because I chose not to work when they were little, and because I'm grappling now with the consequences of that (which I foresaw, incidentally).
I sense this is turning into a blog post in its own right, when all I wanted to do was to send you over to Fertile Feminism. It's a website that was set up by Noble Savage (she who has been blogging since 2005), and you can read about its aims here. For me, reading this blog is the way I keep a small toe dipped in feminist water. So I'll stop now, and if you want to see me sporting my feminist garb, head on over.
It's a post about why there are so many Daddy blogs in the finalists of the MADs awards.
I'm very pleased and honoured to have your post up at my place, thank you again for writing about it, and so well to boot!
ReplyDeleteI'm heading right over, love fertile feminism. Of course you can be a feminist and an at home mum. There are somant advantages to kids of having an at home parent. In my post feminist world, either parent can and will be able to make that choice and have it supported by society, not just women.
ReplyDeleteA feminist in England seems to me to be an all-too-rare thing. I just have not found much of what I found to be normal in the US... I know I've blogged about it before as have the She's Not from Yorkshire ladies.
ReplyDeleteI agree feminism is just about fighting for what is fair. To have the same rights and responsibilities as men.
ReplyDeleteAs for being a role model, I think whether you are a SAHM or a WM like me, we still beat ourselves up about whether we are providing a good role model or not. I'd like my daughter to have a choice about whether to work or stay at home, so I guess I fight for women's rights to work if they want to because I grew up in a world where that was very difficult to achieve. I think she will be fighting for the right to stay at home to raise children because we've created a world where some women have to work to put food on the table, when they would rather stay at home.
When will we ever achieve a balance?
Sorry, touched a feminist nerve there!
I have to agree with Working Mum - I was freelance before my children were born and yes my clients have been super loyal...so I am a bit of both. My daughter is still small but I have gone through the conversations I might have with her. I have a good few friends my age that 'just sort of didn't get around to having children'. I often wonder too what advice I would give my twenty something self....Super post thanks xx
ReplyDeleteI'm having big big trouble with the whole feminism thing as well - obviously I'm a feminist, but raising children has brought home to me the profound differences between men and women, boys and girls. This is a tough thing to deal with. And the examples of course.
ReplyDeleteGreat post! I think its easy for us to forget what it was the first feminist were fighting for. The right to vote, the right to birth control, the right to be heard and taken seriously as human beings. We owe it to those women to proudly call ourselves feminist and to support all women whether they be SAHM or WM.
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