You disappoint me, John Lewis

One of the things that was annoying about living abroad, was that so few online retailers are geared up for you as a customer. I can't tell you the number of times I tried to order a present for a friend or family member in the UK, only to find out that I couldn't pay because my credit card had a US address. Why didn't you keep a UK credit card?, I hear you ask. I did. But even my UK credit card has a US billing address. Because the billing address is where you live. Not all of us have two houses.

Once, in an attempt to purchase an item and get round this payment problem, I said I'd sign up for a store card, thinking I'd only have to use it that one time, so no harm would be done. Of course it didn't work. I can't remember the detail of why, but I do know that it meant my unsuspecting friend, whose address I'd put in as a delivery address, received a store card of some description, Gold Customer, I seem to remember, though why she would ever want to shop at Toys R Us (yes, I'm looking at you), I can't imagine. And I still couldn't pay for the gift.

Some companies have the imagination or wit or brain or whatever it is to get round this problem. It is not difficult. It just means you have to have two spaces to put in two different addresses: the delivery address and the card billing address. And the card billing address has to be able to accept a 5-digit zip code, not just a 6-digit post code. Maybe it's more complicated than that behind the scenes, but some companies manage it, so why not all?

The other way round the problem, is to use your own individual imagination or wit or brain or whatever. I did just this recently, when buying a gift for a god-daughter. Last summer, when I was up in Fife, I heard about a friend who had set up a small knitting business. It started as a knitting circle, meeting one evening a week in a cafe, and has now become a shop. I tucked that piece of knowledge into the dark recesses of my mind, and a few months later, not wanting to subscribe another friend to Toys R Rubbish in a vain attempt to spend money, instead I phoned my craft-and-knitting friend, purchased a felt craft kit over the phone, and asked her to gift wrap it and post it for me. You could do the same, by visiting this website. And if you need a reason to visit it, beyond all the obvious ones to do with quality, choice, and supporting a new small business, then if I told you it was a shop called The Woolly Brew, would that persuade you? How great a name is that? Greater than Toys R Plastic, that's for sure.

So how does this all relate to John Lewis? Patience... I'm getting to that. John Lewis was one of my go-to companies for purchasing gifts for people in the UK, when I lived in the US. It's a brand name you can rely on - except for that blip about 16 years ago, when they fulfillled wedding lists with seconds china, on the assumption (correct in my case) that the recipients would be in a haze of newly-wed bliss or befuddlement, and not notice. But I've forgiven them that blip, I've always liked the company, and found them reliable. I receive emails from them, and today, they sent me one saying "Exclusive to our international customers; win your shopping weekend in London". Yay. Well, who wouldn't want to win a week-end in London (even one without a hyphen - or is that me being old-fashioned?) So I thought I'd enter, but since I haven't technically been an international customer since last Wednesday, I checked out the Terms and Conditions. I discovered that to be eligible to enter, you have to live in France or Germany. Funny that, because I don't. And I assume they know I don't. And during the process of entering the competition, it doesn't become apparent that you need to. When you are asked to specify where you live, you are given a drop-down menu of hundreds of countries (you know the one).

Sorry, John Lewis, but I think if your competition is only open to people living in France or Germany, you should say so. You specify that France includes Corsica, so you've obviously thought about it. And yes, you require entrants to tick a box saying they accept the Terms and Conditions, and so I suppose it's their own fault if they have failed to read them, but I expect better from you. It's now going to irritate me whenever I use those bowls that are clearly seconds.


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